Romeo and Juliet -The ridiculous story that brought together millions

              Not to long ago, I finished my school term. Before it ended, in my English class, we were reading Shakespeare's famous Romeo and Juliet. 
              Something my teacher couldn't stress enough was how ridiculous the story actually is... And after laughing at our awe-struck faces (come on admit it you'd never expect a high school teacher to say that Romeo and Juliet is ridiculous!) she preceded to explain:
              When you think about it, R&J is about 2 teens who meet and who, 5 days (DAYS PEOPLE!) later, are the cause of 6 deaths; including both their suicides. Not to mention that within those 5 days, Romeo becomes a murderer, is banished from the city and breaks into his wife's coffin. On the other hand Juliet is engaged and prepared to be married to another guy (she's almost 14), takes a potion to appear dead on her wedding day to avoid the marriage and wakes up from her 'sleep' about two seconds after Romeo dies at her feet! I'm not even going to go into the Friar Laurence's story but let's just admit the guy married off two fourteen year olds.... let that speak for itself.

Romeo & Juliet from the film version
(with Dicaprio) making out in an elevator

               Okay let me go into more specified criticism. I like talking about Juliet. Now I understand she's a hormonal teenager. I truly understand that. But realistically speaking, what happened between her and Romeo? He flirted with her and they start making out in a corner. (Or, in the movie, an elevator) Then when he finds his way to underneath her balcony and answers her when she is talking to herself.... Okay. Wait. Can I just point out what's wrong with this image? He has essentially broken into her property and watched her whilst she is unaware. This is considered what in real life? Yes people, that is a stalker! Or a vampire.... (Anyone? Anyone? Twilight reference? No? Okay) Besides that they talk and stuff, whatever. He tells her to meet him and she says she can't leave her house... um what the hell? You lie to your parents later on in the book and tell them you're going to church anyway! Why not lie now and go meet 'your love' yourself? But no she sends her nanny. 

Statue of Juliet in Verona, Italy
Rubbing above her heart is said to
bring good luck in love

(Can I just say Romeo hangs out with some pretty big jerks cause the second they see this old lady they start making fun of her with all kind of sexual innuendo.) Anyway, then all of a sudden they're married. (I'd go into more detail but this part of the book is fuzzy so I'm not entirely sure of what happens.) Afterwards her dad comes up to her and tells her that she's gonna get married and when she tries to say no he has a spaz attack! Moving on. So obviously when you don't want to get married for a second time because it's against your religion, you go to the priest of your first wedding right? And then when he gives you some random potion you drink it? What if he's trying to kill you? He doesn't want to offend God; he's a priest! Maybe if he kills you he won't be against God because he won't have given you two husbands. Or what if he were to fail miserably and potion made you so ill you wouldn't be able to move?! Remember, it seems like this girl has only met Friar Laurence recently so he could be some deranged lunatic that convinced Romeo he was a priest! Who knows??? Then after she drinks that thing she's put into her coffin and there's her funeral. When she finally wakes up, she finds Romeo dead at her feet with a poison bottle in his hand. Right away she thinks 'why didn't you leave me any poison? If you die I want to come too...' Can you imagine that in our times? Your boyfriend of three days dies from cancer and you say 'well I want some cancer too....' And then she kills herself before she gets caught not actually being dead. (Side note, can you imagine what her parents must have said when they thought she had died twice? I mean, before Friar Laurence explained...) I mean come on. Well I do see why she is considered the most faithful wife ever: she died rather than 'cheat' on her husband. (Let the records show that I really do like Juliet as a character but I perceive some of her ideals and actions naive and frankly stupid which I guess is kind of the point... we are from different points of history after all)
                 Personally I love Romeo way too much to judge him so I'm not going to say anything about his screw-ups... I guess I'm going to judge the book as a whole now. (BTW Dicaprio was so hot in the movie, Oh My God it was unbelievable.)

The ever famous balcony scene where the line
'Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?' is said by Juliet

                 The story itself is UNBELIEVA-BLE! It's completely unrealistic! But Shakespeare filled the characters. He made it seem realistic and that is why he is an amazing writer! He is a linguistic genius and we all know that when we have all died, and our children have all died, his stories will still be around to be told and re-told. Heck when the aliens come down to our planet when none of us ever exist they will find the books, bring it to their planet and share it with their world. But until then Romeo and Juliet will be a story I hold near to my heart, partly because the beautiful use of the English language, partly because it gives kids like me a glimpse back into time to see how the world was like, but mainly because Shakespeare took the most unrealistic story ever and made it seem like it could be something that happened everyday. He made an unrealistic story real and I respect him -a lot- for doing that.

                       Just another thought about literature from me
                                                 -Kimzy